don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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