He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
