Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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