some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize