Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
