You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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