I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
