worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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