didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
My pussy is not your playground.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
