I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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