i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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