Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Randomize
