my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
