I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
sex in a hospital.. check
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
