can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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