question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
