They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
