what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Did you just see the Batmobile???
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
