i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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