Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
