i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
