So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
