yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
