I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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