I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize