how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
