smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
