do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
