Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I got her a Nickelback box set.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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