someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Randomize
