Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize
