My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
