we're blogging at a bar
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Randomize
