Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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