What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
She's not a foreskin expert like you
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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