Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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