Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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