But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
