I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
