HIV tests are more positive than that guy
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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