Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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