Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
