I am spending my child support on dildos
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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