He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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