Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
