Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
