'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize