I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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