Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
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