I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
