the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Be still, my beating vagina.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm at about main and main street
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
