I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
