Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
