Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
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